Misstropolis

Tuesday, May 06, 2008

My Beautiful Mommy

by Abigail Jones

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Imagine you’re seven years old. You come home from school one day and Mommy is wrapped in bandages. Then, when they come off, she doesn’t look like herself. She has a new nose. Bigger breasts. And a waist you didn’t even know existed. What’s going on?

Just a “mommy makeover.” Tummy tucks, nose jobs, breast augmentation - it’s all part of a package of quick-fix solutions for women who, for a variety of reasons, are unsatisfied with their bodies. But what do moms tell their children about their sudden transformations? Dr. Michael Salzhauer, a plastic surgeon in Bal Harbour, Florida has an answer in the form of a new children’s book due out this Mother’s Day.

MY BEAUTIFUL MOMMY geared towards children aged 4 to 7, follows one mother’s decision to get a nose job and a tummy tuck and the way she explains it to her daughter.

The publisher says the book “guides children through Mommy’s surgery and healing process in a friendly, non-threatening way” and the book’s website claims it’s “a must-have for any mother with young children considering plastic surgery.” Bad grammar aside (is it the mother or the young children considering plastic surgery?) MY BEAUTIFUL MOMMY has already been featured in Newsweek and The Huffington Post, discussed on ABC News and the Today show and spoofed on YouTube - and it hasn’t even come out yet.

Sneak-peaks inside the picture book reveal that “Dr. Michael” (named after Dr. Salzhauer himself) boasts bulging muscles and looks more like a cartoon superhero than an actual doctor. In one scene, the little girl listens to him explain what he’s going to do to her mother: “Blah, Blah, Blah, Tummy, Blah, Blah, Blah, Nose.” The picture is small, but you can just make out what’s meant to be an unflattering bump on Mommy’s nose. At another point in the book, Mommy says to her daughter, “You see, as I got older, my body stretched and I couldn’t fit into my clothes anymore. Dr. Michael is going to help fix that and make me feel better.” She explains that she won’t only look “different, my dear—prettier!”

Last year, women had 10.7 million cosmetic procedures, according to the American Society of Plastic Surgeons. Breast augmentation and liposuction were the top two surgical procedures among women (347,500 and 269,000 respectively), followed by nose reshaping at 211,000. Not all procedures are equal. Many women get breast reductions and gastric bypass surgery for medical reasons, while others seek out the “mommy makeover” for upkeep or perfection. Regardless of the motivation, plastic surgery is here to stay, which is why a book like MY BEAUTIFUL MOMMY is making headlines, even if its content isn’t entirely realistic. (Salzhauer admits he avoids the issue of the mother’s larger breasts; critics argue that the story and illustrations simplify surgery and its affects on a child.)

One mother I know says that if she’d had plastic surgery when her kids were 5 years old, she probably wouldn’t have told them, at least not in detail. “At that age, the important point is that mommy will return and be in bed for a while, not feeling so well but getting better - not so much mommy coming home and looking different.” She points out that she lost fifteen pounds when her kids were that young, and they didn’t notice a thing.

I’m not a mother and I haven’t had plastic surgery. But I have spent a lot of time speaking with women who do have children, and I think it’s important for moms who are having surgery to explain to their kids what they’re doing and why they’re doing it.

Take the story of Alicia Douvall and her daughter. Douvall, a former model in the U.K., has had over 50 cosmetic surgery procedures; she hardly looks human any more. Now her daughter, Georgia, wants a boob job for her 13th birthday. Douvall claimed to be “surprised” but told a reporter, “My mum always taught me to take care of my appearance and that’s all I’ve taught Georgia. Surgery’s just the modern-day next level.”

The book is targeted at young kids, but what about older children? Surely a mother’s plastic surgery affects her kids regardless of their age. Teenage girls are surrounded by pressures to be thin and beautiful - watching their mothers go under the knife to perfect their physical appearance can’t help. Talking with teenagers about the reasons people elect to have plastic surgery can ultimately impact their confidence and self-respect.

Has plastic surgery really become the answer to taking care of oneself? Hopefully not, but MY BEAUTIFUL MOMMY reminds us that conversations about such surgeries are important, however we feel about it. Still, the most important message will always be that MOMMY is BEAUTIFUL no matter what.