Wednesday, July 09, 2008
After Gloucester: Preventing Teen Pregnancy
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This June the seaside town of Gloucester, MA made international headlines when High School Principal Joseph Sullivan told Time that skyrocketing pregnancy rates in the school were the result of a “pact” made by a group of students to get pregnant at the same time and raise their babies together. This line showed up again and again in news reports: “some girls seemed more upset when they weren’t pregnant than when they were.”
As many as 18 students were pregnant, according to the town newspaper. Concern had initially been raised when the school health clinic reported increasing requests for pregnancy tests.
The pact theory has since lost much of its credibility, the mayor has launched an investigation and Principal Sullivan has buckled under pressure, claiming his memory has escaped him. But the fact of the pregnancies remains and if nothing else, the Gloucester story brought serious attention to an issue that few want to think about.
The Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) reported last month that almost half (48%) of high school teens say they have had sex - an increase of 2% between 2005 and 2007. During the same time period, the proportion of high school teens who say they used a condom the last time they had sex decreased 2%.
This is where The National Campaign to Prevent Teen and Unplanned Pregnancy comes in, and it’s an organization every parent should know about. One of the largest and most powerful national groups working to prevent problems like those Gloucester is facing, The National Campaign has a Board of Directors that looks like it belongs to the Carnegie Corporation or Apple. In 2002, they were awarded a grant from the CDC to help states and communities improve their teen pregnancy prevention efforts.
Their mission is simply stated yet chronically difficult to achieve: improve the lives and future prospects of children and families and, in particular, help ensure that children are born into stable, two-parent families who are committed to and ready for the demanding task of raising the next generation.
As Gloucester and many other communities around the country know, this goal takes a commitment from legislators, educators, teenagers and parents. Since teen pregnancy is closely linked to so many other social problems - poverty, overall child well-being, out-of-wedlock births, responsible fatherhood, health issues, education, child welfare, and other risky behavior, finding new and effective ways to reduce its occurance is crucial work.
Following are ten steps outlined by the National Campaign to help parents do all they can to prevent pregnancies in their own young families.
1. Be clear about your own sexual values and attitudes.
Communicating with your children about sex, love, and relationships is often more successful when you are certain in your own mind about these issues.
2. Talk with your children early and often about sex, and be specific.
Kids have lots of questions about sex, and they often say that the source they’d most like to go to for answers is their parents. Start the conversation, and make sure that it is honest, open, and respectful.
Age-appropriate conversations about relationships and intimacy should begin early in a child’s life and continue through adolescence. Resist the idea that there should be just one conversation about all this - you know, “the talk.” The truth is that parents and kids should be talking about sex and love all along… And if you have regular conversations, you won’t worry so much about making a mistake or saying something not quite right, because you’ll always be able to talk again.
By the way, research clearly shows that talking with your children about sex does not encourage them to become sexually active. And remember, too, that your own behavior should match your words.
3. Supervise and monitor your children and adolescents.
Establish rules, curfews, and standards of expected behavior, preferably through an open process of family discussion and respectful communication… Supervising and monitoring your kids’ whereabouts doesn’t make you a nag; it makes you a parent.
4. Know your children’s friends and their families.
Some parents even arrange to meet with to establish common rules and expectations. It is easier to enforce a curfew that all friends share rather than one that makes him or her different - but even if your views don’t match those of other parents, hold fast to your convictions.
5. Discourage early, frequent, and steady dating.
Let your child know about your strong feelings about this throughout childhood - don’t wait until your young teen proposes a plan that differs from your preferences in this area; otherwise, he or she will think you just don’t like the particular person or invitation.
6. Take a strong stand against your daughter dating a boy significantly older than she is. And don’t allow your son to develop an intense relationship with a girl much younger than he is.
Try setting a limit of no more than a two- (or at most three-) year age difference. The power differences between younger girls and older boys or men can lead girls into risky situations, including unwanted sex and sex with no protection.
7. Help your teenagers have options for the future that are more attractive than early pregnancy and parenthood.
Community service, in particular, not only teaches job skills, but can also put teens in touch with a wide variety of committed and caring adults.
8. Let your kids know that you value education highly.
Encourage your children to take school seriously and to set high expectations about their school performance. School failure is often the first sign of trouble that can end in teenage parenthood.
9. Know what your kids are watching, reading, and listening to.
The media are chock full of material sending the wrong messages. Sex rarely has meaning, unplanned pregnancy seldom happens… Is this consistent with your expectations and values? If not, it is important to talk with your children about what the media portray and what you think about it… You will probably not be able to fully control what your children see and hear, but you can certainly make your views known and control your own home environment.
10. Strive for a relationship that is warm in tone, firm in discipline, and rich in communication, and one that emphasizes mutual trust and respect. Express love and affection clearly and often. Hug your children, and tell them how much they mean to you.
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